Saturday, January 19, 2008

justin is running out real quickly to get us some ice cream from Baskin Robbins before we watch Finding Neverland (which we got for christmas from my sister).

the last couple days have been rough for adelaide. she has been barfing at night. Last night she threw up around 1am and then again around 2am. She also barfed on Wednesday evening...twice. We're not sure if she has a bug or its something shes eating. Watching a baby throw up is a VERY painstaking sight. they just look so helpless and confused and in need. it is really terrible. so needless to say i have been so worried that she is going to dehydrate and die (no seriously...dehydrate and die). it is really awful the sense of panic that has entered my life since she got here. i am not the calm zen mother that i thought i would be when it comes to feeling helpless. hopefully this will pass soon and she'll be rockin' this hood hard core.

i spend alot of time imaging "my home". You know the house that i don't live in but dream about. i think about the kitchen, the bathroom, the yard, the neighbors, where we would go to church. i really wish i didn't think about it so much because i know its a long way off and that is the road we chose in order for me to stay home with adelaide (which was an awesome decision). it also puts me in a complainy mood about my current "home" and i just hate that when there are so many things to be thankful for.

justin and i seem to have been arguing a bit lately...which i hate. actually i would call it fighting not so much arguing. i notice the flare up when we are struggling with lack of sleep but what it weird is it comes on like a flash flood. we're good...we're good....we're good and then BAM a huge fight. anyways, i hate it. so does he i am sure.

well i should wrap this up i guess. justin has Monday off and i am excited he'll be here for 3 days! wish we had known sooner so we could have planned a more exciting weekend (we were looking for last minute tickets to seattle but alas they were too expensive ;)).

grace and peace.